Thursday, September 04, 2008
Is it me or have I moved so much during that period of time that I need to move more? Originally, the idea was to occupy myself with events and activities in order to get that incident out of my mind. Now, I need to be busy. I need more events and activities. My brain feels dead and so does my body. Everything is just too slow. Addiction to adrenaline; even the smallest form. I need to move more. I need to run. Fast. Everything's just too too slow. I need more activities.
But then again, everyone seems so far away. And I miss the old times, where we could just plan something on the spot and get another 30 people to follow us. Where we could just sit down on one spot and play our guitars and sing til our lungs felt like bursting. And it's all gone. That 'brotherhood', those friendships. Everyone's in their own world now. I'm not just talking about church, I'm talking about school as well. The friends I used to talk to with about my problems and all that, all gone. And the people I see everyday know nothing about me. The people I used to trust and confide in, all gone, disappeared into their own world. Sigh. Why. Why do people have to change? I don't see a need to. I miss my past. Where I could just have fun and not care about anything for endless days. Sigh.
Now it's just moving for the sake of motion. Someone wake me up.
i made it known at 11:51 AM
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